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Here are some jokes based on some recent news items.

Starbucks is sticking to it’s policy of letting people carry guns in their stores where it’s legal.  I’m not sure which is more scary about that, having an impatient customer at the end of a slow moving line with a gun or somebody with a gun after having a triple espresso.

But why should Starbucks worry about people carrying guns in their stores.  With the prices they charge who is robbing who anyway.

In New York an Air Traffic controller was suspended after letting his children do his job for a short time.  This made the pilots very jealous.  One of them said I want to bring my kid to work to so he can fly the plane while I sleep off my hangover.

When Nancy Pelosi became the Speaker of the House she had said she intended to clean up the ethics in Congress.  But so far there is no change as we constantly hear of members of the House being in ethics trouble.  We do know it wasn’t for lack of supplies that she has been unsuccessful at cleaning up, for example, we know she has a broom because she flew in on it.

I’m a little worried about the upcoming census being done by the Obama administration.  If they count people like they count jobs created, by the end of the census we’ll have more people than China.

Rumor has it that Obama is using the same technology to steer the administration that Toyota used on the steering of their cars.

…and finally, Toyota has learned if they do one more recall on their cars they will have earned a foreign aid stimulus package.

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Here are some jokes that are based on recent happenings around the country, which depending how you look at things can always be a source of humor.

It has been such a cold winter in many places this year, including even Florida with record lows, that homeless people were found burning Al Gore in effigy, not because they were mad at him, but just to keep warm.

Lawmakers in New Jersey recently passed a new law okaying medical marijuana for people with severe illnesses such as cancer, AIDS and Lou Gehrig’s disease.  Afterward, outside the capitol building, there were a bunch of potheads wearing Yankee caps saying, “I consider-sider-sider myself-self-self the luckiest man on the face-ace-ace of the earth-rth-rth.”

Harry Reid called Obama a ”light skinned Afro-American with no Negro dialect”, which made him electable in the 2008 election.  Now recently the former governor of Illinois, Blagojevich, was quoted in Esquire magazine as saying “He’s blacker than Obama.”  So, we can now all breathe a sigh of relief knowing that Blagojevich is no longer electable to government office.

John Edward’s wife filed for divorce recently citing irreconcilable differences, plus the fact that he was definitely NOT too big to fail.

The Fair Tax people, which is a group promoting a National Sales tax to replace the IRS have legitimately claimed that if their plan was implemented many new jobs would be created.  Can you imagine how good it could be if they used the Obama administration method of counting new jobs after the stimulus?  There would be more jobs that there are people.

President Obama is getting so unpopular he could disguise himself as a fire hydrant and his dog wouldn’t even appreciate him…. When former President Bush was asked what he thought of the job Obama was doing he was quoted as saying, “nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah. nayh, nayh.”…Even the Socialist party in the US is distancing itself from Obama….All the democrats are hoping the 2.0 version of the Obama presidency will be released well before the November elections (and that it is better than the typical Microsoft “improved” versions).

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