They were going to have Ben Bernake throw out the first pitch of the World Series but they were afraid that by the time the ball reached home plate it would have been inflated to the size of a balloon and then everybody would be looking for the “balloon boy”, who couldn’t be found anywhere, and the game would never get started.

Next, they asked Hilary Clinton to throw out the first pitch but she said no, unless Obama was willing to stand in at the plate.  Baseball officials said that the first pitch in this tradition doesn’t have a batter.  Hillary said, “Who said I wanted him to have a bat?”…  Baseball officials wisely declined.

The Yankees looked like they barely showed up for the first game of the series.  I guess they were working on the Obama and Fed premise that they were ”too big to fail’.

There were a lot of celebrities in the stands when they played in New York.  There was even a reality show producer there and after the first game he tried to get CC Sabathia to be on “The Biggest Loser”.  (Hey what did you expect, I’m a Phillies fan.)

I understand that Obama tried to appoint a Baseball Czar before the World Series but when he decreed there would be no real winner or loser in the series Baseball Officials put that idea to a halt.

It was not publicly known but they almost ran out of balls in one of the games so Alex Rodriguez made the suggestion to put the game on steroids so they could grow a whole new set if they needed to.

darnfunnyonline.com

 ”You might be a redneck if you think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are ‘Play Ball’” – Comedian Jeff Foxworthy

 ”Tickets now read: ‘Game starts at 7:30 – Game ends when the Yankees finish whoopin’ ass.’” – David Letterman

 ”Baseball, basketball and football players play golf when they retire. Pro golfers don’t play baseball, basketball and football when they retire.” – Rick Woodson

 ”According to The Sporting News, over the last four years, Wade Boggs hit .800 with women in scoring position.” – David Letterman

 Bill Clinton was at a baseball game. Before the game began a secret service man came up to him and whispered in his ear.

President Clinton suddenly picked up Hillary and threw her out on the field.

The secret service man came running up to him and said, “Mr. President Sir, I think you misunderstood me; I said throw out the first pitch.” – anonymous

Comedian Rich Hall said he figured out why Pete Rose isn’t in the Hall of Fame.

“Pete was probably sitting in some bar and told this guy he wouldn’t make the Hall of Fame.”

“That’s crazy,” the guy replies, “Of course, you can get in. Look at all the records you set”

“Bet you a million bucks I don’t get elected.” – anonymous

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life,
she will choose to save the infant’s life without even considering if there are men on base. – Dave Barry

Is There Baseball In Heaven?

Two old men had been best friends for years, and they both live to their early 90’s, when one of them suddenly falls deathly ill. His friend comes to visit him on his deathbed, and they’re reminiscing about their long friendship, when the dying man’s friend asks, “Listen, when you die, do me a favor. I want to know if there’s baseball in heaven.”

The dying man said, “We’ve been friends for years, this I’ll do for you.” And then he dies.

A couple days later, his surviving friend is sleeping when he hears his friend’s voice. The voice says, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there’s baseball in heaven.”

“What’s the bad news?”

“You’re pitching on Wednesday.” – anonymous

darnfunnyonline.com