Some Nancy Pelosi Jokes
Posted by Steve Yeich | Posted in Jokes | Posted on 02-06-2010
Tags: Bill Maher jokes, hilarious jokes, Jay Leno jokes, Jimmy Fallon jokes, jokes from late night comedians, Nancy Pelosi jokes, really funny jokes
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Here are some jokes about Nancy Pelosi from the late night comedians over the last few years:
“Of course, this all couldn’t have been done without the help of Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi. And today, the president thanked her for her unblinking support.” –Jay Leno, on the passage of health care reform
“Actually, Nancy Pelosi used the Internet to help gain support for this. She reached out to people on her favorite social networking site, Icantmovemyfacebook.com.” –Jay Leno
“Before the health care vote, protesters on Capitol Hill heckled Nancy Pelosi. But she managed to keep a stiff upper lip, as well as a tightly stretched forehead, and an unnaturally arched eyebrow.” –Jay Leno
“Speaker Nancy Pelosi is in Shanghai to debate climate change with Chinese government officials. I think she’ll do fine. These negotiations always come down to whoever blinks first.” –Jimmy Fallon
“Yesterday, during a speech, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi said the CIA misleads us all the time…You know, unlike Congress.” –Jay Leno
“According to the Social Security Administration, the most popular girls name in America right now is Emma. The least popular girls name: Pelosi.” –Jay Leno
“House Speaker Nancy Pelosi now says the CIA and President Bush misled her on waterboarding. Yeah. Apparently she was misled by the Bush Administration. So she spends eight years telling everybody how dumb President Bush is, and the minute they’re in trouble, ‘He fooled me! I had no idea! He tricked me!’” –Jay Leno
“They say Nancy Pelosi was aware, as far back as 2003 that we tortured and didn’t raise any questions about it. Which raises the big question: what did Nancy Pelosi know, and when was she going to tell her face?” –Bill Maher
“This is a big controversy, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said the CIA lied to her in 2003. Yeah, apparently, they sent her a document saying that her makeup looked subtle. They lied to her.” –Jimmy Fallon
“It was so cold in Washington, it felt like Hillary’s inauguration. It was so cold, Al Gore led a prayer for global warming. In fact, by the end of the inauguration, everybody’s face looked like Nancy Pelosi.” –Jay Leno
“Many Republicans are upset with … Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s recent demand for regular use of the Air Force’s C-32 — the same type of aircraft the Vice President and the first lady use. They’re also not thrilled with her demand to be carried around Washington Cleopatra-style.” –Amy Poehler
“Today Nancy Pelosi became the first woman Speaker of the House. They say this is the furthest anyone in a dress has gotten in Washington since J. Edgar Hoover.” –Jay Leno
“Nancy Pelosi said today we’ve waited 200 years for this. 200 years? How many face lifts has this woman had?” –Jay Leno
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