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Some Dick Gregory Jokes

Posted by Steve Yeich | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 28-06-2010

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Here are some jokes by comedian Dick Gregory, who was very popular back in the 60’s and 70’s:

Hell hath no fury like a liberal scorned.

I am really enjoying the new Martin Luther King Jr stamp – just think about all those white bigots, licking the backside of a black man.

I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

I never learned hate at home, or shame. I had to go to school for that.

I wouldn’t mind paying taxes – if I knew they were going to a friendly country.

If it wasn’t for Abe Lincoln, I’d still be on the open market.

In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago it’s a sport.

Just being a Negro doesn’t qualify you to understand the race situation any more than being sick makes you an expert on medicine.

Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.

We used to root for the Indians against the cavalry, because we didn’t think it was fair in the history books that when the cavalry won it was a great victory, and when the Indians won it was a massacre.

When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship.

You know why Madison Avenue advertising has never done well in Harlem? We’re the only ones who know what it means to be Brand X.

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