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Here are some jokes from the late night comedians over the years about sex and politics, which can be pretty much synonymous terms anyway:

“President Bush was asked by someone in the audience if he’d seen ‘Brokeback Mountain.’ The president said he hadn’t seen it, but he’d be happy to talk about ranching. Then he added, ‘Ranching still means gay sex, right?’” –Conan O’Brien

“Remember when Republicans, like Newt Gingrich and Bob Livingston, when they got in trouble it was for sex scandals? See Tom DeLay is in trouble for money. Or as Republicans would call it — this is a return to traditional values.” –Jay Leno

“California education officials said today that the state of California needs 52,000 more teachers. They say we are facing a huge teacher shortage. In fact, by the year 2007, they said many students will be forced to have sex with each other.” –Jay Leno

“Did you hear the video game industry has changed the ratings of the game Grand Theft Auto to an adult-only rating after pressure from media watch dog groups and politicians because the game had hidden sexual content? Politicians felt the sex would have a negative effect on the children. See that shows you how up tight we are in this country about sex. Apparently a game when you’re stealing cars and killing cops is okay — it’s the sex we’re worried about.” –Jay Leno

“Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton has called for an investigation of the video game Grand Theft Auto after finding hidden sex in the game. I don’t know, is Hillary the best one to go looking for hidden sex? If Hillary was any good at finding it, her husband wouldn’t have been impeached.” –Jay Leno

“There is a new book out about Hillary Clinton that claims Bill is still having affairs but Hillary continues to look the other way. The only problem is when Hillary does look the other way Bill’s having sex with a women over there too.” –Jay Leno

“The John Bolton nomination has cleared the committee. Larry Flynt has entered the fray. He said he has evidence Bolton bought tickets to a swingers club and forced his wife to have group sex. Today Ted Kennedy said he’s heard enough — he’s voting yes.” –Bill Maher

Sen. Hillary Clinton called for President Bush to begin pulling troops out of Iraq next year. And let me tell you something, when it comes to telling a president when to pull out, no one has more experience than Hillary Clinton.” –Jay Leno

“Jeff Gannon … He is a White House correspondent who has been lobbing softball questions at the president and his press secretary, turns out he is actually a paid escort for wealthy homosexuals. … He actually had two jobs — one obviously was sleazy and shameful and the other was a gay male prostitute. … I think I know what Bush meant now when he said he has a mandate.” –Bill Maher

“The government has announced that Medicare will now cover sexual performance drugs like Viagra. This is part of President Bush’s no erection left behind.” –Jay Leno

“Taking a page from their tsunami playbook, the White House announced today that former presidents Bush and Bill Clinton will head up the fundraising efforts for the hurricane relief. And you know, Bill Clinton is no stranger to this kind of thing. He was once visiting the French Quarter during a hurricane and got blown behind a dumpster.” –Bill Maher

“Today in Washington, Governor-elect Arnold Schwarzenegger had lunch with Senator Ted Kennedy. I understand Gloria Allred is now representing the waitress.” —Jay Leno

“It’s Bring Your Daughter to Work Day. This tradition began about 25 years ago down in Washington, D.C. by a quick-thinking Ted Kennedy who was spotted leaving his office with an 18-year-old.” —David Letterman

“Bill Clinton’s book went on sale today at long last. Earlier today hundreds of people waited outside of Barnes and Noble in the pouring rain for a chance to meet Bill Clinton. When asked if she minded the rain, one woman said, ‘I’m meeting Bill Clinton. I just assumed my dress would get ruined.’” —Conan O’Brien

“Hillary’s got this huge book, it’s a memoir of her life and times at the White House. In the book she says when Bill told her he was having an affair, she said ‘I could hardly breath, I was gulping for air.’ No, I’m sorry, that’s what Monica said.” —David Letterman

“Our old friend Monica Lewinksy is back in the news. She has been accepted to graduate school in London. She says she wants to be a psychologist. Yeah, now she says she wants to blow people’s minds.” –Bill Maher

“Bill Clinton’s new memoir has already had orders for 1.5 million copies. In fact, it’s already in its third printing. The first two were stained.” —David Letterman

“Did you see Rehnquist when he arrived? He was hunched over, wearing a black beret and a big oversized robe. In fact, Bill Clinton saw him from the back and said, ‘Monica?’” –Jay Leno, on seeing Chief Justice William Rehnquist at President Bush’s inauguration

“Bill Clinton went back into the hospital today so surgeons can clean up from his last operation — remove fluid build up. Now isn’t that what got him impeached last time?” –Jay Leno

“Not everyone is happy about the library. Some architectural critics say that the library look like a double-wide trailer. … In fact there is even a sign outside that says: ‘If the library is rocking don’t come a knocking.’” –Conan O’Brien, on the Clinton Presidential Library

“Former President Clinton is doing well and getting better everyday. In fact, yesterday they took him off his respirator and today they took him off his nurse.” —Conan O’Brien

“A new article in Vanity Fair says Bill Clinton is having trouble finishing his new book, entitled ‘My Life,’ in time to meet his deadline. It’s not too surprising, since you can only type so fast using one hand.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Monica Lewinsky told this month’s Cosmo magazine that if it weren’t for Bill Clinton, she would be a mom now, with two kids. Really? Not the way she was doing it.” —Jay Leno

Letterman “President Bush has authorized the drop of 15,000-pound bombs on Afghanistan. I believe that is the heaviest ordered drop by a president since … well, Monica.” —David Letterman

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