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Funny Observations from Current Events – 06/12/12

Posted by Steve Yeich | Posted in Jokes | Posted on 12-06-2012

Tags: , , , , ,

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Here are some funny observations after keeping an eye on current events over the last week:

According to a new book, in high school, Barack Obama smoked marijuana non-stop.  So, maybe he was never trying to hide the fact that he was born in Kenya, he just couldn’t remember it.

President Obama has held his 150th fundraiser since launching his re-election campaign 14 months ago. So, actually, he has created jobs – for all the food severs at his fundraisers.

According to reports, Obama may fall short on his fundraising goals.  That’s why he is really pushing the Fed to do QE3 so that there will be some companies with money to get kickbacks from.

Mitt Romney’s campaign is in the news for misspelling several words in his promotional items.  I, personaly, donut think it’s thate bog of a deel.

Joan Rivers turned 79 last week.  To celebrate she had her79th plastic surgery.

Miss Pennsylvania, from the Miss USA pageant has come forward and said the pageant was fixed.  Clearly, she did not win the Miss Congeniality award.

The #2 man in power in al-Qaeda has been killed.  In lieu of flowers, the family requests that you send festal virgins because there has been a real shortage of those, what with all the dead al-Qaeda guys lately.

The #2 al-Qaeda guy was killed by an American drone.  I know what you’re thinking, that he was listening to one of Obama’s campaign speeches, but the drone was actually an unmanned airplane.

The Japanese have developed what they call “diet glasses.”  They visually trick you into thinking portions of food are bigger than they are.  They can also be put on backwards for when your wife asks if her ass looks fat in her jeans.

Forensic Anthropologists at the University of Tennessee have reported that human heads are getting bigger.  The common man on the street has observed that society’s asses are also getting bigger.

Before Congress leaves for summer recess, President Obama has challenged them to create jobs and help the middle class.  He was quoted saying, “I got nothin’.  Whatta you got?”

The National Spelling Bee champion’s name is Snigtha Nandipati.  It stands to reason if she could spell that name she was going to win the spelling bee.

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