Funny Observations from Current Events – 09/06/11
Posted by Steve Yeich | Posted in Jokes | Posted on 06-09-2011
Tags: funny current events, funny Obama jokes, funny observations, funny observations from current events, funny one-liners, hilarious jokes, really funny jokes
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Here are some funny observations after keeping an eye on current events over the last week:
Obama appointed a new White House economist. He is considered an expert on unemployment. What do we need him for? We already have way more unemployment than we want.
The FDA has approved the use of Botox to treat incontinence. An unfortunate side effect is that your bladder looks like Nancy Pelosi.
Chaz Bono is going to be a contestant on Dancing with the Stars which raises several questions. When did he become a star? And do they match him up with a male or female instructor?
Both Colin Powell and Condoleeza Rice are accusing Dick Cheney of taking cheap shots at them in his book. I hope they don’t go hunting with him or those cheap shots will become gun shots.
Obama’s uncle was arrested on suspicion of drunk driving. After the policeman told him he was related to the president the officer asked him to prove it. He told him he thought taxes should be raised and everybody should be forced to buy health insurance. The cop rolled his eyes and said, “Yup, you’re related.”
David Reynolds the former CEO of Reynolds Aluminum, has passed away at age 96. At the funeral, when it ended, everyone had to resist the urge to say, “Let’s wrap this up.”
Yesterday was Labor Day, which many people this year, because of current economic policies, were calling Lack of Labor Day.
Since yesterday was Labor Day and it was quiet it gave me time to reflect on some things I’ve always wondered about, such as:
- In movies when there is an outer space alien that is a bad guy, why do they always speak with a British accent?
- Since there are no more phone booths, where does Superman change his clothes?
- Did any mime ever escape from their invisible box?
- Why do people that talk with accents sing without an accent?
- If a Hermaphrodite (a person with both male and female sex organs) has sex with himself/herself would it actually be considered masturbation?
(And that is how I spent my holiday.)
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