Best Late Night Jokes for the Week – 04/02/10
Posted by Steve Yeich | Posted in Jokes | Posted on 02-04-2010
Tags: Craig Ferguson jokes, Jay Leno jokes, Jimmy Fallon jokes, late night comedians jokes, late night jokes
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Here are the best jokes of the week from the late night comedians:
“Well, earlier today, President Obama canceled the annual White House Easter Egg Hunt. Instead, the kids are going to be on the lawn of the White House drilling for oil.” –Jay Leno
“Well, here’s some good news for us. Iran’s top nuclear scientist has defected to the CIA and is now here in the United States. He’s now on our side. And he had some frightening information. He said Iran was just weeks away from developing their very own Toyota Prius.” –Jay Leno
“Hey, you guys, baseball season starts next week. And President Obama is going to throw out the first pitch at the Nationals game. Meanwhile, Joe Biden will be on hand to make the first error.” -Jimmy Fallon
“Do you know in Switzerland, in Geneva, scientists are celebrating? They have a multimillion-dollar atom-smasher that has given us new information on how the universe began. Couldn’t these scientists save some money and just ask Larry King?” –Craig Ferguson
“During a fundraising trip to California, some young Republicans took the Republican Party credit card to a club in Hollywood that has nude dancers doing bondage shows. Usually when Republicans find themselves in dark rooms with whips and chains, it’s in Dick Cheney’s basement. ” –Craig Ferguson
“It must be very embarrassing for the people involved. I’m sure the strippers didn’t want anyone to know they were hanging out with politicians.” –Craig Ferguson
“On the ‘Today’ show this morning, President Obama said that adjustments will need to be made to the new healthcare law. In fact, it’s getting so many adjustments, Obama’s now calling it the Heidi Montag of congressional bills.” –Jimmy Fallon
“President Obama made a surprise visit to Afghanistan this past weekend. I guess after the last 14 months in Washington, he wanted to go someplace where there was less fighting.” –Jay Leno
“Pretty quick trip. In fact, it happened so fast, Joe Biden didn’t even have a chance to say something stupid about it.” –Jay Leno
“And, as you know, the people have spoken, but health care passed anyway.” –Jay Leno
“Osama bin Laden has released a new audiotape in which he threatens to kill Americans. You know, as opposed to his earlier, new-age motivational tape.” –Jay Leno
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